How many members of your horoscope sign does it take to change a light bulb?


ARIES: Just one. You want to make something of it?

TAURUS:  One, but just “try” to convince them that the burned-out bulb is useless and should be thrown away.

GEMINI:   Two, but the job never gets done–they just keep arguing about who is supposed to do it and how it's supposed to be done.

CANCER:  Just one. But it takes a therapist three years to help them through the grief process.

LEO:          Leos don't change light bulbs, although sometimes their agent will get a Virgo to do the job for them while they're out.

VIRGO:     Approximately 1.0000000 with an error of +/- 1 millionth. 

LIBRA:   Er, two. Or maybe one. No - on second thought, make that two. Is that okay with you?

SCORPIO: That information is strictly secret and shared only with the Enlightened Ones in the Star Chamber of the Ancient Hierarchical Order.

SAGITTARIUS:  The sun is shining, the day is young and we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid light bulb?

CAPRICORN:  I don't waste my time with these childish jokes.

AQUARIUS: Well, you have to remember that everything is energy, so…

PISCES:         Light bulb? What light bulb?