Week Four - Recovering a Sense of Integrity

This is the week, says JC, that we will be catapulted “into productive introspection and integration of new self-awareness.”  She says this may come as a shock and as a result there may be resistance to the Morning Pages. The MPs are the place where everything spills out – the good, the bad & the ugly – and usually if it’s a surprise, it sticks there until we do something about it. JC says it is common to begin avoiding the MPs if dealing with what comes up gets too painful.

 Now, I don’t know about you, but I have been LOVING the morning pages. There have been a couple of days when I was too disorganized to get them written first thing, so I’ve had to do them at lunch. But now that I’m doing them, I can’t imagine not having them to ground myself each day. I am saying this because I want to have it down in case I fall into this hole of not wanting to write… of avoiding what winds up on paper by not writing.

I’ve already begun feeling some of the things pointed to in this chapter. For example, the urge to weed and purge old, unused things has taken hold. JC says this is the result of shifts in perception that I am having as I discover for my self what I am really all about. Out with the old, in with the new. I don’t have a huge budget for the new, but little by little I can add a few items of clothing, and some books and a few fun toys, but all in all, I think I will toss more than I replace. And last weekend I decided I was finished eating meat.

She also says that for many the changes are less dramatic, so it’s not like “it’s not working” if you’re not throwing everything away and spending time on an emotional roller coaster!

So, in working with the morning pages, certain things come to light that weren’t visible before. I’m discovering things about myself that surprise me, and I am acting on them because JC says to trust myself! (Might as well, huh?) The synchronistic episodes feel like clues that I’m doing what I should be doing. It feels like it’s a puzzle with the pieces gradually falling into place.

I’d love to hear other perspectives on this.