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christopher and ct… enjoying the thread (and whoever else is watching and/or cares to participate). nice to be back interacting as well ct.
i think it is clearly a process and i think it takes time. i have been focused in various ways on myself and slowly, but surely i feel like i have more to offer both online and perhaps locally as well. i am not sure how to facilitate some things just given my spacial limitations lately and my other limitations as far as location and the interest locally (i am not in an urban center).
i have looked at groups before and i think i resisted the chaos of founding or leading something. there is a gay spiritual group locally called 'lavender tribe' but it is very much a miss mosh of things. i think perhaps more focus than a gay group that is spiritual… such as gay mystics vs. gay spirituality. there can be a lot of politics around the word gay 'like the issue we had with the use of the word 'queer' in the 'conscious queers' pod. depending on the size one can take a lot of heat. a lot of pressures and different voices and interests. when i closed conscious queers and started this group i got someone upset because i used 'gay' instead of queer. when i had the queer term i had a few comments from people not into that. it took me a bit and i told the other person to start their own group if they wanted something else and they did. it can take a thick skin to lead it seems. my skin is getting somewhat thicker and my ability to facilitate and allow chaos seems to be improving as well. the culture is so intense and dominant that there may need to be bridges from where it is to where many may yearn for it to go.
many a bright eyed gay boy comes out only to be treated like an object only to later objectify himself and others. it is such an intense culture. blacks had generations of slavery and being abused by their 'masters' in this country. gay people have generations of closeted lives and shaming and of course many are still shamed and ostracized. so i think we get abuse mentality and a certain mob mentality. maybe since sex often stems from so many other things, the thing to focus on initially is not the sex and to allow people their journeys with that, but allow them safe spaces to talk and feel and be conscious. because otherwise they may just wind up doing it anyhow and hating themselves and yet if they are allowed to feel it and be conscious then evolution can happen in ways that are right for their souls.
so many gay people are cut off from spirituality. i have commented on that before. i think that is a big chunk of it. so many have been told god hates them since such young ages and have been taught that the divine exists in their parents hands or the hands of the religious leaders. that their connection to the divine is only through others. that then of course leads to a lot of disconnection from grace and one's deepest aspects of self.
i think earlier in this pod their is a posting on ho opono opono, hawaiian mysticism where they talk about looking in one's self for the wounding happening externally and healing that. from that view we as a group could look at the layers of wounding in ourselves that are manifesting externally in the pain and destruction of the gay community. not in a way of manipulating things outside so much as just giving love to others no matter how they may be living or acting and what we may think that means. not having ourselves not offering love where things go against our views. perhaps having boundaries, but not letting it shut us down from offering care and compassion for our community.
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