In transition

sharing and exploring

Re: Transition

As human beings
we have the wonderful opportunity
to experience the many forms and stages of love

Even before we begin our life in this world
our mother's love is there to sustain us
it is expressed in her body
as it spontaneously and naturally feeds ours
growing us from a single sperm and egg
into a living being

Her's is our first
and perhaps our most important love
for without her care
we could not be
Our bond with her is infinitely deep
for she comforts us, feeds us, protects us from the elements
In our completely vulnerable condition
she is the source of our very survival
From her smile
we learn ours

As we grow in our environment
our minds are veraciously devouring experiences
we grow language at an incredible rate
impatient to participate in the social expression
with our parents and siblings
we develop deep bonds
with our siblings, brothers and sisters
they become our teachers
on this journey of mutual exploration and learning

In our adolescence,
our bodies experience an enormous growth spurt
and our minds must keep stride
moving us from children to adults
and we form friendships
to explore this period of great transition

As young adult
we experience what it is
to have a not quite fully developed mind
housed in an almost fully developed body

These new aspects of body
lead us to new physical and body sensations
and our love transforms again
as we learn about another dimension, physical love
With the mind / body union complete
we move into dating, courtship and sexual exploration
experiences we had little interest in as children

Our interest now focuses on the rituals of courtship
and seeking a life partner
perhaps to marry and begin a family of our own
and coming full circle

If we do
we now find ourselves
on the other side of motherhood/fatherhood
and we are privileged to experience love from the other side
our love now flowing out to our children
Often it is only during these times
that we finally realize what a huge responsibility it is to be a parent
and we develop newfound appreciation for our parents

Or we may choose to be single
and live by ourselves
Some may consider pursuing a more spiritual, universal love
entering a monastic type life
while others may simply not have the desire
to be in a monogamous relationship

In modern societies
We may feel we have made a wrong choice in our quest for love
and we may divorce and begin anew with other partners

For all
our parents will sooner or later
become aged and sick
and we now find ourselves caring and loving them
in repayment for the love they bestowed upon us

As we grow
we go through so many stages and types of love
Each one gives us more insight
rounds our idea of love out even more

As we travel through these various stages
we begin to realize
that only the experiences of life
can truly teach us empathy for others
by allowing us to see from perspectives
that we hitherto had no access to

We only truly understand the sacrifice of our parents
when we ourselves become parents
We only truly understand the depth of their love for us
when we love our children to an equal depth

In our journey
we become expert in so many forms
of this miraculous emotion
making us older and wiser

Re: In transition

Roles change as we age, from cared for daughter role reversal means that I am now caring for a dependent mother. I visited her in hospital today, and it was lovely to see her face light up and soften into contentment when I explained arrangements are being made for her to come home soon, she requires help with all normal personal tasks now, it is like carrying another, everything I do for myself I do for her, even simple things like taking her tablets, if I didn't watch them go down they would end up on the floor,  I need to be vigilant and sensitive to her needs, because she doesn't think for herself as she used to. I sleep with one ear tuned to her room like one does for a baby, the last time she fell it was 2.30 am and I was out of bed like a shot. If we get disturbed nights I try to care for myself by snatching a rest when she does in the day, and because I am aware my patience is more fragile when very tired.
     Transitioning we do learn and become wiser, but I would say wiser in our own experience of love. I am expert on what is true for me but never presume to be an expert for another. If asked I may share what works for me, it may or may not resonate for someone else, growth comes at our own pace, when we are ready for it. Have you ever noticed that, how a book falls into our hands at precicely the right moment? How the universe weaves it's magic? 

Re: In transition

yes, Gael, it's amazing how a book or a teaching or whatever is needed comes at just the right time.

good to see you are taking care of yourself while you care lovingly for your mom.

Re: In transition

Yes Nicole, ashamed to say I actually have snapped once or twice when very tired ,and then felt remorse and apologised, so now I try to guard against getting tired.
It makes sense, I also gratefully accept any help that's available for the same reason.

Re: In transition

Zephyr I'm wanting to say, no need to feel shame for being human. If you can get rest, it makes a lot of sense to do so - when it's not possible, you're going to be having a tough time. Taking care of an ailing elderly loved one on an ongoing basis takes a lot of toil on one and is really challenging in so many ways. Wishing you love, time to rest and 'me-time' as you continue on this loving task - you are doing something truly amazing.

Re: In transition

dearest Gael, I agree with Anna. I do it too when I am tired and otherwise not at my best, and I know most of us have the same problem. I have the most profound admiration for all you do not just for your mom but in the rest of your life. You are truly awesome.

Love,

Nicole

Re: In transition

Thank you both, I think she will be home tomorrow., thats a relief, it's quite a journey to visit.

Re: In transition

Enjoy having mom at home again, Zephyr! Here's a TLC gift for you

Re: In transition

Oooh, that looks inviting, thank you. I have just finnished the washing and cleaning, fed and watered the animals, and harvested all my onions before they would have been soaked in a storm, they store better if they are dry. Just ready for a soak and a cuppa before Mum arrives home, She will be arriving in about an hour. The hospital have classed her as high dependency, so she should get better care now when we have respite.

Re: In transition

hope the soak was long and good & the cuppa downright amazing! Mom is on her way! Your hands are going to be full, love. We're here to share a cuppa when you need to catch your breath