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The Red SuitcaseClevelandX said Jun 14, 2008, 5:06 AM: |
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…excerpt from the journal of Amanda Santiago I used to love my husband. Tim was once the man my world revolved around. I would have done anything for him. For the past six months I’ve lived in fear. It was after Tim went off on a business trip to Maine. He returned with a red suite case and a different demeanor. He wasn’t the man I loved anymore. He was different. There was a rage inside him that he never used to have. He used to care about me. When he looked at me I could see the love in his eyes. I hate it when he looks at me now. It’s like he’s reading the pieces that make me human, judging them, weighing them. I don’t see love I just see an emptiness. I’ve heard him talking, not to someone else, but to himself. He seems to be struggling with something in his mind. He calls the invisible part of himself Amadeus. That’s the scariest part of the new Tim. Amadeus. He sounds horrible. When Tim speaks with him I can almost hear Amadeus talking back. His voice, his words, they aren’t from our existence. They don’t come from a sane mind. It’s that suitcase. Tim won’t let it out of his sight. His attachment to it is very unsettling. This afternoon Tim is going to the airport. He’s going on a trip to Chicago for a few weeks. I don’t think I’ll be here when he gets back. Good-bye, my love. “Why did I ever agree to this,” questioned Tim “I should have just let it all go.” He leaned back against the seat just as sunlight flashed into his eyes. He quickly jerked his head to one side. Several sun spots danced in his field of vision. After a few moments they cleared out of the way and his sight was clear again. Tim sighed as he carefully rested one hand on the top of the red suitcase that lay in the chair next to him. Tim had spent the last half hour in the airport terminal just sitting and watching the other passengers mill about their lives. “You know why you did it.” A figure suddenly materialized in front of where Tim was sitting. “What do you want Amadeus?” Annoyance was apparent in Tim’s voice. “You asked a question. Who more qualified to answer than a servant from the Man himself.” Tim looked Amadeus square in the face before turning away in disgust. “Regretting the deal, is that it Tim?” Tim said nothing. “You know she’s not going to be there when you get home this time.” Tim remained silent. “After everything you did. You mortgaged your own existence. You put a price on your life for that little whore and now she’s going to just walk away from you!! You’re stuck with this ‘deal’ for another seventy years and you won’t even have her to spend it with,” Amadeus smiled coldly, “you’re so fucking pathetic.” Tim sprung from his seat and stood nose to nose with Amadeus. To anyone else in the airport terminal it looked like Tim was just standing there talking to himself. In Tim’s mind, in his reality, Amadeus existed. He was as real as anyone you’d meet on any given day, in any given city. He had substance. “Shut your mouth or I swear on all that’s holy I’ll throw that suitcase into the river the second I get off that plane in Chicago!!” “NEVER! You couldn’t do that!! You know you couldn’t, it’s bound to you now. Don’t play games with me you little bitch, you’ll never win.” Tim dropped back into his chair, a defeated man. He knew no matter what he said or did Amadeus would always hold the last card. He hated the feeling of being in a position with only one option. Keep doing as you’re told. “You’ve got the ticket to Chicago. Flight leaves in twenty minutes. It’ll be on time,” predicted Amadeus. “SO!!” barked Tim as he glared up at his companion. “So, it’s enough time for a job.” Tim’s gaze suddenly dropped to the floor. “I don’t want to.” “You made the deal. Your life was over, but you wanted to come back. You wanted to be back for HER, your little Amanda. You knew what the job was when you agreed so don’t give me that shit about not wanting to do it!!!!” Tim reached over and grabbed the red suitcase. “Where!?!” he demanded. Amadeus directed him to the nearby men’s room. As soon as Tim entered he locked the door. Inside the restroom Tim ran a quick check of the stalls. All empty save one. Tim could see the feet from under the door. He waited until the man stepped out of the stall and up to the sink before he reacted. Tim tapped the man on the shoulder. As the man turned around, Tim flipped open the suitcase and held it up. The stranger’s eyes were suddenly caught by a bright yellow light. Tim watched the image from the suitcase reflect in the man’s eyes. As the yellow glow became increasingly more intense emotion began to close down inside of Tim, he’d done this so much all sympathy he felt for the victim just disappeared. He’d become desensitized to the process. In a single flash the man in front of the suitcase disappeared. Tim quickly closed the case and headed for the bathroom door. Amadeus was waiting outside to commend Tim on his work. “Would you like to know his story?” “No” grumbled Tim as he headed to the boarding gate. “3 kids, a wife, 2 dogs, home in the suburbs, never took a sick day off in his entire life, never late for work. His name was William Harrison.” Tim didn’t bother replying. He hated everything about what his life had become. “The silent treatment huh, that’s fine. This was all part of the consequence for being given another run at life. You died in Maine, my friend. Fell asleep at the wheel, dreaming of your pretty little wife. Your car slammed into a telephone pole doing 90. You begged to go back to her, you pleaded to spend a few more years here with her. Look what’s it’s done to you. You hate what it’s turned you into and you just shut it all out hoping you can erase it from your soul. You shut it out and you shut her out. She’s gone, long gone.” Tears began to well up in Tim’s eyes as the memories of the night he died came flooding back to him. He’d pushed them so deep inside himself that he’d hoped he’d never have to deal with the reality of it, the reality of himself, again. “Lest you forget, even God has to have people to do his dirty work. It was offered and you took it.” Tim wiped the tears away with the sleeve of his shirt as he headed to the boarding gate. “The war isn’t far off. Both sides are trying to fill out their ranks. You do this for the future of the planet, keep that in mind.” With that, Amadeus vanished from Tim’s view. Tim took a deep breath and handed his ticket to the stewardess at the gate. She looked at the ticket and gave him a speedy once over completely disregarding the suitcase. She waived him through to the plane without a second thought. |
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