Gaia: Romancing the Double

Re: Getting to know you ..

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 07:42:27 GMT

Let us know what you think .. and how it effects your life.

Ladee

Re: The Java Hut

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 07:40:12 GMT

:)

My pleasure!

Re: The Java Hut

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 03:29:13 GMT

My aim screen name is eignabanana if anyone wants to chat about life... = D

Thank you for starting this pod group, Ladee!

Re: Getting to know you ..

Mon, 10 Mar 2008 03:26:56 GMT

"Tell us about yourself, how you got interested in Toltec Wisdom and your Path."

I have heard of his books for awhile, Ruiz's, but was always skeptical. Then i started reading paulo coelho. then i received a mini-book called "Wisdom from the mastery of Love" and that hooked me. went to the bookstore the same day and bought all the books they had by ruiz (all four that they had...) that was yesterday. = )

-Angel

Re: Teacher and Student

Sun, 09 Mar 2008 23:25:16 GMT

What or who is a Teacher?

Someone who is a slightly more courageous companion on the path of life

What or who is a Student?

Someone who is a slightly more shy companion on the path of life

Who was your first Spiritual Teacher?

Myself

Assuming that two individuals have chosen to formalize their relationship into a Teacher/Student dynamic what are their responsibilties to each other?

Honesty

What is your response to:
I will teach you if you _________ (fill in the blank).

open your heart to me.

What kind of agreements happen between Teacher and Student?

i don't know this one

What are the ramifications of that dynamic?

dunno.

Can we be both at the same moment?

no! i don't believe we can, not at the same moment, well maybe...

i got the first two answers from reading paulo coelho's "The witch of portobello" great book.

Make Contact With Your Higher Self

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Wed, 31 Oct 2007 23:22:07 GMT

A workshop. An experience. Transformation. Held in beautiful Joshua Tree, January 18-20, 2008.

More information at:
http://events.zaadz.com/3172/make_contact_with_your_higher_self/3921

Maybe I'll see you there!
Ladee

Movin' on ...

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Mon, 13 Aug 2007 19:38:17 GMT

Sometimes the answers to my questions come flying out of my mouth - if I'll only hear them. I write to clear my head and actually hear ... this here is a process, incomplete ...

There are a great bunch of folks who work and run the other stores in the strip where the Quantum Shaman™ (the gift store where I work, part time) is located. Over the last several months we've gotten to know each other a bit more than the casual wave, 'hello.' There's a tattoo place with some really interesting characters, an adult/head shop with the enigmatic lady and a "rails" store at the far end run by a woman and her husband. Because of the nature of the shop (the name really gets their attention) people come in asking all kinds of questions. Yesterday, for instance, one of the teenagers looked around and said, "This is all witchy stuff, isn't it?" I looked at the clothing, then picked up one of the faerie statues and looked at her quizically and said, "Uh, not really." People come in with questions about dreams and dreaming, asking how to read Tarot, or what to buy their friend who's pagan (but is a xtrian, so has no idea).

Last night, after I'd closed up and was heading to the car, one of the guys from the tattoo shop stopped me and asked, "Do you know anything about succubus'?" "Uh, a little," I replied, and he launched into some tale about his friend's car being taken over and influencing him and wanted to know where to find an exorcist or what could he do. The words that came flying out of my mouth, I credit to Tesse, "What you know is true." I made a couple of suggestions for shifting the perception around the "possession," but when it was obvious I wasn't getting through, I shrugged my shoulders and moved on.

"What you know is true" reverberated in my head for the next 15 miles of long desert stretch home. Most of which I spent slack-jawed and on autopilot. One of the things I'd asked myself was "what DO I know?" and kept coming up with answers like, "I love my home. I love the life I've carved out. I'm poor. I can't find work. I'm confused about what to do next." And wondered how I shift my perception/AP to know something different. "What you know is true."

"What you know is true." I make and create my reality by knowing its truth. By creating the truth.

What if I didn't know anything? How would life look and feel and be different. To not know anything. There's an essence here to this concept that I don't know (heh, there's that word again) how to put into words. Years ago, at a seminar in personal growth, the presenter showed us a chart:

I know that I know
I know
I think I know
I think I don't know
I know that I don't know
I don't know
What the f*ck, go for it anyway!

This feels a little like that, but more ... profound. To listen between the silence. To surrender to the unknown. To just experience the now.

The question that keeps coming up against all that is ... how do I pay the effing rent? Or do I? Letting go. Surrender to the now.

I wonder.

This a work in progress.

Re: Life as a Mirror

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Fri, 20 Jul 2007 02:49:57 GMT

I'd be interested in knowing what kinds of sparks it set off for you.

Care to share?
Ladee

Re: Life as a Mirror

http://heliosremedy.gaia.com — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 16:40:22 GMT

that's really a beautiful and interesting thought. you are sparking it for me here.

best of luck with your family and the situations you find yourself in.

The Choices We Make

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Tue, 26 Jun 2007 18:26:46 GMT

Recently my father underwent open heart surgery. This is an excerpt from my journal that I thought might spark some interesting conversation ....
_______________________________

Years ago, I learned that each moment in our lives is some kind of Choice Point. We're making decisions all the time ... do I do this or that? Sometimes, the decision seems minute and unimportant and other times it's a profound, apparent life-changing decision. We are not always aware of how profoundly our decisions can effect others.

My Dad's not perfect. I've been aware of this most of my life (as a kid, I worshiped him). After my Mom died, Dad married one of the women with whom he'd had an affair. At the time, it made a warped kind of sense. He'd confided in me that he'd never been alone, and didn't want to figure out, that late in life, how to do it (he was in his 60's), and here was this woman who claimed to want him, and she was a familiar place to be. Dad rather got the shock of his life when she cut him off from sex right after the marriage, claiming she'd only said she enjoyed it, to win him. Dad, being who he is, didn't take long before he started to stray. To keep her man, my dad's wife took measures .... I won't detail them here ... to assure he didn't succeed. Fast forward thirteen years.

The end result of the steps to ensure my dad's fidelity, created a slowly developed, vast rift between Dad and his kids. By the time he was in the hospital what this looked like was: his wife (I have a very hard time calling her a step-mother) treated all us kids rather like obligatory, secondary citizens. It wasn't until I was in the same hospital room with her and Dad that I really *got* how vast was that gulf between us, and it hit me like a ton of bricks. Again, no need for details, but it ended with us kids having the feeling of being excluded (whether intentionally or not), with very hurt feelings as a bonus. And a couple of very ugly scenes.

All this has caused us siblings to rally 'round each other and support each other in a way we haven't done since our mom's death nearly fifteen years ago. It's pretty amazing to see how we've all set aside some of the differences between us to see the common ground. We've worked through the worst of things and now I/we have a very odd sense of peace over the whole thing. At first, I was concerned that I was "detaching" or being in denial. But, all the feelings are there, just softened by an (almost enforced) acceptance of what is. After we all got through the resentment, the love took over. It's nearly epiphanous.

And, I'm sitting here, looking back and realizing how deeply one choice can impact so many. When my Dad decided to accept the "call" of this woman, he chose her over his children. Even at the time, we all kind of looked at him and said, "Dad! What're you doin'!!??" And because she's a caustic presence (and trust me when I say I'm being polite with that term), most of us pulled away to some extent, and he drifted more toward those people who met a different standard. Okay. His choice. He's allowed to make those kinds of decisions in his life. I don't, for a minute, think he did so consciously, with an awareness of how it would look and feel fifteen years down the road. And, yet, those decisions ended up hurting those he loved. And we, in turn, nearly hurt each other ... very much.

I am VERY proud of his children. We have all chosen to not reciprocate in kind ... instead, we're loving him through this hard time and treating his wife with a deference she doesn't afford us, and if/when he survives this ... and if it still seems worth the effort ... we'll let him in on our epiphanies. That his choice to remain married to her pushed us away - and it hurt. Deeply. And we love him, anyway.

'Course ... he already knows what that feels like, I'm sure. It's not like some of the choices we kids have made, made sense to him ... and he loved us, anyway.

Re: Lucid Dreaming

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Mon, 30 Apr 2007 05:47:58 GMT

When I first starting exploring lucid Dreaming, I rarely remembered my dreams, let alone go lucid. When I did remember them, they were almost always in shades of gray or black and white.

There were a number of things I did and many of them had some positive effect.

I discovered, for instance, that if I remembered a dream, it was most likely during a nap, rather than during night dreaming. Then I'd read that sleeping off the ground enhanced Dreaming. So, for a while, I took my daily nap (I'd been taking a daily nap for as long as I could remember) in a hammock. My first breakthrough came when I remembered a dream in which there was color. I was ***so*** jazzed. I went to my friend/mentor and fairly danced, "The napkin ... it was BLUE!!!" (that color is still vivid in my mind.)

Encouraged by this experience I tried a number of things ...

If I read, go to sleep by music or tv, or engage in physical activities just prior to going to sleep, I usually don't remember my dreams ... a meditative state seems to enhance the possibility of dreaming and dreaming lucidly
I concentrate/allow myself (give myself permission) to go lucid in my dreams, as I fall asleep
In most of my dreams, everything seems real... except for that floating thing I do ... LOL ... so I suggested to my sleeping self, that if I was floating, I *just* might be dreaming
I've read a number of places that if you can set a trigger for yourself: like seeing your hands in dreaming ... and then go lucid
I know a number of folks who record their dreams, whether lucid or not (helping them to remember with better detail)... for me, by the time I reach for a pen and paper, the dream drifts away too quickly. So, instead, I lie in bed with my fingers tented over my heart and work backwards through my dreams.

I've tried incense, various kinds of stones ... but mostly what I discovered is that it's a matter of Intent. I still remember and go lucid most often during naps. Interesting, no?

Thanks for asking ... does that help?
Ladee

Re: Lucid Dreaming

http://teotl.gaia.com — Sat, 28 Apr 2007 17:59:02 GMT

Gypsy ladee; do you have any techniques, tools or excercises that enhance the dreaming experience you would like to share ?

Re: The Mastery of Love

http://haledavid1.gaia.com — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 11:40:53 GMT

Well said. Hey hey it's me back from hiatus. Actually I've been popping in and out reading posts on occasion yet not much to say.

I offer validation to what Gypsy Lady said more to help myself remember this very useful reminder.

I often find I start trying to teach when I most need to learn.

Blessings all, David

Re: The Mastery of Love

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 15:52:35 GMT

Hi, Kira :)

I'm glad that resonated with you! It's always nice to have validation ... though not necessary ... eh?

I'm going to insert a comment here that's not intended for any one person, but as a general comment and one that I think fits in with this conversation.

When I/we post to these discussions, I just want to be clear that I/we should be posting from personal perspective. I'm of the firm conviction that we are all students and teachers together ... what we're sharing are lessons learned and life values based on those experiences. I'd hate for anyone to think that any one of us is preaching ... whether it's "to the choir" (those who are already in agreement) or posing as an expert. I know *I'm* no expert, just someone who's walked this Path for a long time and made some, hopefully, valuable discoveries.

Re: The Mastery of Love

http://masterdreamer22.gaia.com — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 19:51:33 GMT

Hi Ladee -

I enjoyed your post to the Mastery of Love Pod. Deciphering the difference between words of "buddy" and "friend" was powerful for me. I am going to use it in my life.

So many times we think of a "buddy" as is being intimate and it really isn't that type of relationship. I still enjoy and have a great time with this person. However, sometimes I put a mask on with people to maintain the respect and kindess with myself. A best way to describe it would be that our vibrations no longer match. It is a different type of love. An Agape, if you will.

Thanks for your post. It helped me to reflect.

MasterDreamer

Re: The Mastery of Love

http://masterdreamer22.gaia.com — Tue, 20 Mar 2007 19:44:14 GMT

Hi Kira -

I know what you mean about not wanting to change someone. I also began a relationship with no expectaions or assumptions or wishing to change the other person. I continued to reflect with my partner at the time and used it as an opporutinity for myself to grow.

As things have it now, we are no longer together. As I grew through my "stuff" I realized he wasn't reflecting the respect and kindness that I give myself. I am not mad or angry with him anymore. It just didn't work out. We were no longer vibrating together.

Now that I look back at it, I was coming from a broken heart at the beginning of the relationship. I am so happy that I am not vibrating in that space anymore. It was difficult and a very unhappy space. I have a few wounds to heal from this past one, however, what an opportunity to grow! AND, I can find something more beautiful and amazing that matches my new vibration. Thank you for posting that question! It helped me to reflect on where I am.

I also enjoyed and liked the clarification of Friend and Buddy! I am going to use that.

MasterDreamer

Re: Internal Dialogue

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Mon, 22 Jan 2007 01:03:01 GMT

Great post, Silver, thanks!!

Something else occurred to me. I think it is also possible to use the ID as a gauge ... if my thoughts drift ... >there< ... what is it about "there" that's pulling my attention and how did it get there?

[One of the probably not-so-useful ways of shutting off the ID is to never stop doing something ... always occupying my mind with something. The trouble with that is ... is it really getting me anywhere that I want to go. Unless I take the time to Stop the World and sit there for a while, I'll never quite see my growth and development (or lack thereof).

For instance, in this case, the ID was all about making judgments about others. Comparing myself, and my supposed growth, with theirs. My experience has been that when I react to someone, it's really a reflection talking to me. And when I turn that reflection inward, it's an opportunity (doncha just *love* opportunities??? LOL) to process and relinquish.

Good stuff.
Ladee

Re: Internal Dialogue

http://creativequesting.gaia.com — Sun, 21 Jan 2007 13:49:17 GMT

it's been my experience that there are different types of internal dialogue -- one type is the inner critic, and another type (for me, anyway) has to do with a continual to-do list -- the ID nags me about all the things I need to do my inner critic pretty much shut up after several years of very deep psychotherapy during which my self-criticisms were compassionately reframed -- it was phenomenal when that voice turned off -- like listening to a jackhammer for decades and then experiencing silence -- what a blessing! it's my sense that over time I internalized my therapist's compassionate view of me -- he normalized my responses to the impossible situations I was in as a child, instead of pathologizing my responses, as my family had and regarding the to-do list thing -- I've had a tendency to take on too much work and then feel anxious that I won't be able to complete it -- the situation is challenging at times because I'm a freelance writer, and if I turn down a job, I risk the company being less willing to approach me the next time around -- I'm on the go-to list of several big-name educational publishers, and I'm not willing to put those connections at risk -- at the same time, I've learned a few things that are helping to turn down the volume on the ID: --things ALWAYS work out okay -- I always finish projects on time, and the Universe has a great way of shuffling things around when I'm feeling too crunched -- something will get cancelled, or I'll sit down to write and it'll flow particularly quickly, or I'll have a dream that points the way to the resolution of a difficulty in a project -- the more I remind myself that things always work out, the less I get tripped up by anxiety --last year I set two intentions that are bearing fruit: 1) to do more writing and less editing, copyediting, and proofreading (writing is a lot more fun), and 2) to make more money without doing more work -- since then, I've become a regular writer on a project that pays well and provides some job security, which has allowed me to turn away other jobs that are less enjoyable so on the topic of the to-do list ID, I've done a combination of reminding myself very regularly that it always works out okay, learning to trust more that I have the inner resources to handle the things I take on, being patient with myself about certain things I keep putting on the back burner (their time will come...), and setting clear intentions about how I want my life to be and one more thing -- the older I get, the more I'm learning to honor my natural inclinations and not put myself through things that feel wrong to me -- I've chosen to separate from my very dysfunctional family, I don't attend social gatherings where I'll feel extremely uncomfortable, and I don't hang out with people I don't have a sense of kinship with -- all of that reeeeeeeally simplifies my life and eliminates a lot of situations where I might otherwise be asking myself questions about why I can't "get things to work"

Re: Internal Dialogue

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Sat, 20 Jan 2007 16:22:41 GMT

I've had an odd week of sleeping ... working on projects through the night, sleeping during daylight, attempts to restructure my day to reorganize it and sleep, again, during the night. So, last night, at the first sign of being tired (around 8:30pm) I snuggled into my warm covers and drifted off to sleep. Now, where I live, it's literally freezing at night, so when I awoke at around midnight, and after attending to my bodily functions, I crawled back into my warm nest, determined to sleep until at least sunrise. That's the time my Internal Dialogue (ID) loves to come drifting through.

Have you ever noticed how the ID has virtually nothing positive to say? Insipient thoughts that spiral into catty snipes toward others. A couple of minutes of that and I was about ready to decide that I was, afterall, awake, and may as well get up. Then I stopped. Oh, really? Now, why would I do that? Just so that I could escape that thought process? Think not. A warrior friend of mine shared a great tool for stopping the ID ... just sit and observe it. And, like some shrinking wallflower, it recedes into the darkness. Rather like a petulant child who doesn't want to be watched while she misbehaves. Meditation can help with eradicating the ID, but since my intent was to sleep (and perchance to dream), I simply redirected my thoughts to *observing* the ID and woke up about six hours later. :) Success!

So ... observing the Internal Dialogue, meditating ... what other tools have you found helpful to eliminate/diminish the ID? How does eliminating the ID help you with your Walk?

Internal Dialogue

http://gypsyladee.gaia.com — Sat, 20 Jan 2007 15:36:56 GMT

One of the more difficult aspects of living in this world is the Internal Dialogue ... that ongoing chatter in our heads ...