Confusion! haha

When I am just BEing and not analyzing every little thing I automatically feel sure and at peace and I feel as if I am comfortable with anything and everything that may or may not happen in my life.  But I am still fighting too much; I am still clinging to that state of being; I want to be there all of the time.  So when I am not there I feel so unsure.  I'm trying to grasp the expansiveness of everything through the mechanism of thought, but that just makes me feel lost.  I'm sure if I just sit for a while and breathe and let my thoughts quiet down then I will feel at peace again and I will feel like I have a sense of direction in my life. 

I think that it adds to the confusion when I keep thinking about all of these issues that don't matter.  There are so many issues/situations that people take sides on and when I try to choose a side it just makes me feel more lost and more confused.  I suppose this is where the boundaries of thought lie.  It is hard for me to let go.  I feel this deep urge to just keep hanging on to all of these thoughts and to try and use logic to figure out what is “right.”  But I can no longer lie to myself about “right” and “wrong.”  I keep trying to lie to myself, maybe unconsciously, but I just start feeling confused because I know things are not absolute like that.

My moral filter is loosening, but it is still trying to hang on for whatever reason…. maybe because it is easier to only see two sides to everything. I think I'm done thinking about this now hahaha.  After all of these thoughts are finished and I feel weighed down by them I always laugh and realize that none of what I just said matters hahaha!  I mean it does in one sense, but it doesn't matter absolutely, so I would like to stop treating it like it does. There are so many things that matter less in certain ways than people think and matter more in different ways that people are not aware of hahahahaha. 

words are silly hahaha.

Namaste

Re: Confusion! haha

love you, Kevin! it sounds like you are making fantastic progress. i know it probably doesn't feel like it! but keep trusting, keep moving forward.

light and peace,

nicole

Re: Confusion! haha

There are different levels, different realities.

We have atoms. That is a level. Then life complexifies and synergizes and we have humans with cognition. That is another level. Then we have the universe(s). Another level. There are many levels.

Where are you on the atomic level? There is no real you there. The same with the universe level. In between the two, you are. The Middle level, the Middle Reality is mind.

Within the three assumed levels, where is there Source or Spirit?

It is in all three. Yes?

So … what is the nature of mind relative to Source?

Mind is not source in any conclusive sense.

Source subsumes mind.

We fully realize source as our entire being, not just discursive thinking. If we just think, we confine ourselves to one reality, one window of realization.

There is another level. It is Mind.  It is deep within us. From it, many good things effortlessly flow.  And grand realizations and intuitions known to mind come from Mind. Buddha called it the center that cannot be defiled.

We all know our center that cannot be defiled.

Realizing we are many interrelated realities, we are aware and complete. Just selecting one in our mind, we are unhappy, conflicted, and squeezed within a confining reality of limited awareness.

To embrace, we practice acting from our center as our center.

Nothing shall endure but our conditionless center.

Acting from and being our center, mind becomes decentralized as a utility.

ST

 




  

reply to post

silent t

well said

i would not have expressed it that way
i would never have thought to
but i know exactly what you mean
and i agree with what you said

thanks for that

you have shown that its not always necessary
to kick somebodys ass
in order to help them

since i found this pod
i have been practicing that myself

this is maybe the nicest pod yet

love to all

Re: reply to post

Thank you very much, R.

Having once frequented some Zen sites, it seemed like someone was always trying to kick someones ass or insult anyone who disagreed with them or meet their fancy. In this, I have found the old zen masters who carried a big stick a  source of much unnecessary misinterpretation and suffering. People read that stuff and think hurting others is enlightenment. laughing The attacking of others is usually pathological mind, Fundamentalist adult mind.

On this pod, I have had difficulty with two people only. I did my best no to get entrapped. It was sad.

ST

Re: Confusion! haha

kevin

my first response to what you say
is that thinking is being too

you are being all the time
even when asleep

if you are thinking
you still exist while the thinking goes on

you can think and be at the same time

in order to think one must exist
but one need not think in order to be

take a rock for instance

it exists yet it does not think

living things are active

sometimes i sits and thinks
and sometimes i just sits
but this phenomenon of being is continuous uninterupted

it matters not whether you think or not
and if you are thinking it doesnt matter what you think

your existence remains intact
it is the one thing that does not change
it does not move
it is permanent eternal

thinking always comes and goes
but that has never yet gotten in the way of being

maybe you should try some type of meditation

i have a very nice and easy form you could try if you like

love to all

Re: Confusion! haha

:O)

Re: Confusion! haha

thank you all for your comments! I keep them with me always.

Namaste