Gaia: Life Coaching

Motivation

http://spiritualitygirl.gaia.com — Wed, 24 Jan 2007 12:23:06 GMT

Hi everyone!

We've been kinda quiet lately. Sorry for that. As the "cultivator", I have definitely failed in cultivating conversation. Okay, so here I am to start it up again.

My motivation to action put a plan into action has been lacking lately. Oh sure, I have great ideas but for the most part they have been just that, ideas.

How do you bring yourself from ideas to action? What is your motivation?

Looking forward to hearing from you!
Mary :-)

Re: What's Stopping Us?

http://dojoge.gaia.com — Mon, 18 Dec 2006 08:47:23 GMT

Generally speaking, I'd say it's unproductive unconscious beliefs and lack of a well-formed goal.

Personally, I am living my dream... :)

Be well

Donald

Re: What's Stopping Us?

http://yclept.gaia.com — Sun, 10 Dec 2006 03:07:29 GMT

What is stopping me from living my dream?

I suppose my biggest obstacle is actually formulating a clear picture of my dream. My personality is such that I tend to live in the moment and focus on the 'here and now'. I've been working with a coach over the past 2 months and I have begun to formulate ideas on my dream career and dream life. I see the potential of losing focus on the dreams I formulate or deciding to change these in mid stream. Writing out my values, roles and goals has been a helpful practice. I still need to take the time to allow my head to float up in the clouds...and then come back down with a clear picture of where I want to be.

John

Re: What To Do When You Feel Like Giving UP?

http://ShantiM7.gaia.com — Fri, 18 Aug 2006 20:32:21 GMT

Mary,

Thank you for replying. That is a great way to think about it, creating a vision. I have him in my head but I think I want to write him down on paper. I have done that before but I think I need to be extremely specific. I will definately write this down and put it on here.

Abundance of love in my life is through giving to my God Children and receiving in return. Recieving love from my friend Christina and my dear friend Linda. I recieve love from my mother. I feel a strong sense of love when I am at Agape, surrounded by it but I would love to meet more people, wierd sometimes going to a church that has so many members, it is a sea of people. Not sure where to start.

I do have family and friends who show me love and whom I give love to in return but I still find myself by myself a large percentage of the time and I end up going places with just me. This is a major area in my life I am working on shifting.

Mary

Re: What's Stopping Us?

http://thelittlecow.gaia.com — Tue, 15 Aug 2006 01:53:07 GMT

Perhaps your stated goals are not valuable enough to you to make them inevitable.

Using the model that a goal must be as fully fleshed-out as possible and envisioned in the present tense, for this goal must be able to motivate you through all of the intervening distractions - both fun and awful.

A goal that is too puny, or too selfish (or whatever you subconscious abhor) cannot pull you out of a current comfort zone. Most people are very tentative and choose small goals because they are easy. They are also boring. Try to talk one of yoiur children into something you consider boring. How do they respond? That is how you respond, too. Your subconsious mind is a lot like a 6-year-old child. Bright shiny circus goals with much meat, song and motion, will move you where starting a business that will make lots of money but only uses your known skills and talents will not move your 6-year-old self.

Search for the goal that you would do right now, this minute, if money and time were no object. When asked what this would be, many of my clients say, "I would be fishing... but I can't make a living doing that." I know a man who turned his love of such pursuits into a TV show about hunting and fishing and he travels around the world doing expeditions.

I suggest you do not turn away from your most cherished dream for reasons of money or time. These will resolve themselves, if you let the universe handle how your goal will come to you and in what form. As Abraham-Hicks suggest(s) write your to-do list, and put the parts you can do today, i.e. Call somebody to tell them what you are planning to do, on the left hand side and on the right, put all the things that the Universe can do for you, i,e, Bring the person who has the answer to the hardest question you can pose, or finding the funding agent, or what-have-you.

- Wolf

Re: What To Do When You Feel Like Giving UP?

http://spiritualitygirl.gaia.com — Tue, 08 Aug 2006 17:16:08 GMT

Hey Mary,

Thanks for saying hello!

As far as giving up on love, I felt like that too after I got my divorce. I wondered - "Gee, I am such a good person - why can't I find that special one?"

So, Have you created your vision of the perfect person? What does that look like?

And....in what ways is there an abundance of love in your life - whether it's giving or receiving?

Love, :-)
MarySpirit

What To Do When You Feel Like Giving UP?

http://ShantiM7.gaia.com — Tue, 08 Aug 2006 00:54:21 GMT

I like that there is a place that helps me figure it out, thank you for creating this post.

I am at a point of giving up on Love. I used to think that someday it would happen. Now 20 years later, I am 39 and still dating. Sometimes dating is fun but other times,just a complete bore and let down. I am working on the inner workings of my mind, you know the tapes that want to say "You Can't", You Aren't...good enough, intelligient enough, worthy of being with someone who will commit to you". I get tripped up on seeing other people around me get in relationships while I feel like the world moves around me and I just take tiny steps from time to time. Suggestions (Speak the Truth in Love, Please) on how to get past seeing myself as"Mary the longest lasting Single Woman" to "Mary the empowered, happy person, who attracts amazing, intelligient, spiritual commitment minded man"

:)

Re: In order to...

http://ShantiM7.gaia.com — Tue, 08 Aug 2006 00:48:50 GMT

I am familiar with S.M.A.R.T., I learned this in the PSI Basic but one of the things that I think is important when feeling stressed and worried that I won't be able to pay bills is to stop, breath deep breaths, affirm that I am safe and sound and well taken care of and also to make a gratefulness list. I can relate to the feeling scared. For me I want to give up on Love, after so many years of dating, I wonder if there is someone out there I can connect to but it just reminds me to connect to myself, to concentrate on loving me and those around me and to let go of the results.

Re: In order to...

http://coachuno.gaia.com — Fri, 04 Aug 2006 23:54:42 GMT

Mary Spirit,

I too read your note on the road and it has not been conducive to writing anything that I would consider meaningful.

I am certain you know that everything is energy...money...milk...grass...the air we breathe it is all energy in a variety of forms. Worry too is energy...negative energy. Our thoughts are energy and in this Universe like attracts like so we attract to ourselves what we think about on both a conscious and unconscious level. So, worrying is just the opposite of what I am certain you want.

Do you believe you live in an abundant Universe? If you do then everything in the Universe is in abundance including time. And my experience tells me that Universe will in its own time...since it does not live by the clock or the calendar....provide for you all that you desire if you can remain focused on what you want .

The only "cure" or palliative for patience is surrender...a word most of us do not have a very powerful relationship with. I certainly know I struggled to embrace the idea of surrendering ...particularly when we grow up in society and cultures which foster doing as the solution to everything...not doing seems an anachronism...and that is precisely what surrender is about. Not doing what you/we have asked the Universe to take care of.

I would like to better soothe your concerns...trust and all you desire will be yours.

Fondly,

Coach

Re: In order to...

http://spiritualitygirl.gaia.com — Mon, 24 Jul 2006 20:26:45 GMT

Hey Guys,

Sorry I haven't been around. Last week was a bit hectic and I was away from my computer a lot.

So, I need some help. I am worried about my bills, what I'm doing with my life, etc. I'm working on SMART goals but man, it's not easy. I want results NOW and it isn't happening that way. Does anyone have any advice for being patient while you and the Universe do it's work?

Thanks,
Mary

Re: In order to...

Wed, 19 Jul 2006 23:14:40 GMT

Wolf, Thank you for your response. This is great advice -as I have understood. Desensitize anxiety by practicing in safe situations. In case anyone else was wondering what I came up with, as far as the question of what am I getting out of this anxiety. I have come to the conclusion that it served (notice past tense) as a defense mechanism as a child. I kept this method of coping and as an adult have used the "skill" to be sensitive to other people's needs. I called this compassion and empathy. The problem when opening up to other people's emotions, you not only get happy, sad, blue, but also anger, judgemental, and other negative stuff. I try to help with all the negative stuff that does not have me as a basis. I'm still contemplating whether I am justifying an old coping strategy or whether I may have a skill that I just have not figured out completely how to remove my own ego to be of the greatest help.

Re: What's Stopping Us?

Wed, 19 Jul 2006 22:53:53 GMT

Opps. Wrong button. Anyway, I am not an expert on the matter- but here is my opinion. I understand your inner dialog and I am working on that also. As far as clarity of goals are concerned, I think that there is a compromise between complete clarity and the foolish leap of faith. On one end of the spectrum, a person can get caught in analysis paralysis looking for more and more to confirm and justify a decision. On the other end of the spectrum, jumping into projects and goals without understanding the whys and wheres. There will always be the leap of faith factor needed to move forward in many important goals.

Leaps of faith can be difficult - but I believe that if you have clarified your intention and feel it is right for you and humanity, universal energy will support the effort or provide the "uplifting wind" that would direct this positive engery into the direction you need to go.

Lovingly, Lisa

Re: What's Stopping Us?

Wed, 19 Jul 2006 22:44:16 GMT

Dear Coach,

Re: In order to...

http://thelittlecow.gaia.com — Sat, 15 Jul 2006 20:30:17 GMT

Perhaps I could teach people to not need money, but my intention is to be able to be generous without sacrifice. I wish to be knowingly in a larger flow than I can imagine "needing."

Re: In order to...

http://thelittlecow.gaia.com — Sat, 15 Jul 2006 20:27:35 GMT

Hey Lisa!

I perform professionally and am always a little butterfly-stomached just before I go on. What if I forget my lecture notes or I didn't bring the carefully-written sermon or if I forget the words to "Surely the Presence??" I use the feeling to my benefit. The physical experience you get when I am extremely excited are very similar to those I feel when I am scared. The adrenalin rush is the same, so instead of classifying the feeling as fear and embarrassment, I classify it as excitement. Nobody but me knows what I am about to do or say anyway, so there is no danger in the situation. One thing that I do, which you do not appear to do, is actually practice putting myself into controllable small situations, such as a weekly topics session with 2 of my best friends. Each week, one of us did a very small talk on a topic that interested him, for the other 2 people. Short talk, questions and answers afterward, and then coffee and cakes. Zero stress, but your subconscious does not know that. Your subconscious sees every event which you define as being similar to be exactly the same. Another controlable thing is to teach at a Sunday School class. These 7 and 8 yr-olds do not scare you probably, and their judgements are not frightening. Do this for a while and you may well find yourself talking about speaking to large groups of likeminded folks. My biggest crowd (playing in a folk band) was probably about 1000, and my biggest speaking engagement, so far is about 250 people. As screwed up as I sometimes think the performance was, somebody always says what a lot they got out of it, and nobody ever has come up later and said I was awful. In certain venues, I have been heckled by drunks, but I found it extremely amusing.

Re: What's Stopping Us?

http://coachuno.gaia.com — Fri, 14 Jul 2006 22:45:25 GMT

Mary Spirit,

Funny you should ask...I am in the process of defining my own dream. Since, in my world, clarity and the degree thereof are truly the defining attributes to realization I am working assiduously on becoming clear what I want. I know that I want to make a difference in the world. I also know that my coaching practice does this one person at a time and while very rewarding does not completely fill me up. I believe I can be more and therefore do more and make a bigger difference.

Not to sound braggadocio but I have a skill set that is enviable and yet I am not leaping forward. What I believe stops me is fear of failure...those very old recordings of not being enough...which I know on many conscious levels to be totally untrue but the insidous subconscious keeps me tethered and safe.

A recent conversation with a dear friend and client who eoncouraged me to take my work to a larger scale and offered several very viable alternatives all internally rebuffed with penny ante excuses. So, maybe this whole process of seeking clarity is nothing more than a smoke screen to defer taking a stand, making a commitment and getting into action.

What do you all think? Your insights or thoughts are welcome. Thank you for broaching the subject...there truly are no coincidences in the Universe.

Fondly,

Coach

What's Stopping Us?

http://spiritualitygirl.gaia.com — Fri, 14 Jul 2006 16:13:32 GMT

Hi All,

So what's stopping you from living your dream?

Is it:

Obstacles such as lack of confidence, education, skill?

Fear around being actually as great as you are?

Worry over how you will pay the bills, others will see you?

Or is it all of the above?

Would love to hear your thoughts....

MarySpirit

Re: In order to...

http://spiritualitygirl.gaia.com — Fri, 14 Jul 2006 16:11:58 GMT

Hey Lisa, no worries. Feel free to post (if you're comfortable) your response.

MarySpirit

Re: In order to...

Thu, 13 Jul 2006 23:58:20 GMT

Thank you- I have never considered that I do it because it in some way benefits me. I would like to respond to that question immediately, but I believe I may have to dig deep to find that response.

Lisa

Re: In order to...

http://coachuno.gaia.com — Thu, 13 Jul 2006 17:49:02 GMT

Awesome! I love it!

And I get that you were crystal clear what you want. I am convinced that clarity is the secret to manifestation and we also haveto be able and willing to accept that which we seek. Lisa's process of refinement of things on her list is a great example. I am begining to better understand that my acceptance comes when i can see, hear, and feel myself with what it is that I desire. In other words a full embodiment of the manifestation.

I believe Wolf was crystal clear on the shoes and voila! Wolf, how clear are you on your other goals? The process of chunking down helps, in my experience, the process of clarity which has the Universe move more powerfully to co-create that which we want.

I continue to think about your 90/10 but also resonate with the thought that if you could teach others on a massive scale how to manifest as you do this would be an even greater gift to the world.

Fondly,

Coach