Re: Idealists (NFs) & Relationships

http://spiralpalm.gaia.com — Wed, 10 Oct 2007 01:18:43 GMT

Dunno, it seems to me that until you have knowledge of self, as with anything in this life, it's trial and error. That's how we learn, no? You get to a point where you know what you want in a relationship, and the wise wait for that, solitude be damned. ;p

Anyone here seen A Bronx Tale? Sure, you have. ;p In it, Chaz Palminteri's character's speaking to a kid about the 3 great ones we all have as loves in our lives. If, for some reason, we aren't lucky enough to stay with one of them, those 3, i believe, become a template for what it is u truly seek in another.

It's not to say that what we's looking for has to fit the criteria of your 3 'great ones'. Some of us aren't as fortunate as to have one. But you know it when it comes, and it's not something that you have to tell yourself. You feel it. My girlfriend felt it when she and i met. The person i am in relationships, i can be oblivious to things, and my feelings for her hadn't made themselves known due to certain circumstances, but i definately had an inkling. She's the one, naysayers be damned.

Dunno if i'm off the mark as far as the topic of this thread is concerned, just expressing.

Peace.

Idealists (NFs) & Relationships

http://peacemonger.gaia.com — Fri, 08 Sep 2006 08:52:31 GMT

Okay, this is geared towards IDEALISTS who fall into the NF category (Empathist - I LOVE love love that term. It feels so right to me!)

Any comments any of you NFs or others who may be in any kind of relationship with an NF?

- mu

This article is from Penny Potter's website: Penny Potter is a certified administrator of the MBTI. She has been providing businesses, couples, and individuals the MBTI (Myers-Briggs) seminars and counseling in the Washington D.C. area for three years.

________________________________________________________

Know Your Mating Type:

The iNtuitive Feeler (NF) Empathist

Relationships are the central concern for the existence of the intuitive feeling (EMPATHIST) type. Values are what matter in life.

As an EMPATHIST you strive for a special union, a mystical connection, a knowledge of the other that is so profound that words aren't needed for communication. The EMPATHIST wants to make a mystical connection with one special partner: growing, learning, understanding, maturing, as a continuous process throughout life.

Coming to know oneself, coming to understand one's needs, one's fears, one's strengths, one's intuition, one's sensitivity: that is the mission of the EMPATHIST.

The EMPATHIST spares no time, energy or commitment in relationships. The EMPATHIST will compromise all other parts of life for the sake of caring, for the sake of satisfying the life-mission.

The EMPATHIST hopes to find a partner to share life's journey. The EMPATHIST seeks a fellow pilgrim open enough and flexible enough to encounter self and mate without pretense or facade, to embrace the unfolding process without reservation, to love unconditionally, to accept another totally and to be accepted in return.

The EMPATHIST generally sees this lifetime as an interlude, a preface to some more cosmic form of existence and being.

Joan of Arc was an EMPATHIST. They thought she was crazy and they burned her at the stake. EMPATHISTs: take this as a serious harbinger of the fate that befalls you idealistic souls who search for a flawless relationship, especially with any of the other temperamental types!

The EMPATHIST is romance personified. The phrase ``falling in love'' was certainly coined to describe this type. Love may come with a glance, a single word.

The object of an EMPATHIST's affection will be called ``dear'' and ``honey'' and original pet names. ``I love you'' will punctuate each phone conversation and note. The EMPATHIST wants to spend every moment with the loved one or at least a lot of time. Taking care of the mate is a reflexive activity for EMPATHISTs, and gift giving is a natural part of any EMPATHIST love relationship.

The EMPATHIST is usually more interested in romantic possibilities than in the day-to-day reality of relationships. Thus, when disillusionment strikes, when the relationship degenerates to humdrum predictability and staleness, the EMPATHIST may immediately begin eying the greener grass on the other side of the fence. Then the honeymoon is usually over for good!

The EMPATHIST can use that characteristic sensitivity to tune in to every ripple of mood and sentiment in a mate. Or the EMPATHIST can become destructively hypersensitive and suspicious. In the course of any relationship, both modes usually occur.

For the EMPATHIST, sex is fraught with meaning. The EMPATHIST overwhelmed by love aches for union. The EMPATHIST, angry about some routine matter, can't think about sex. Everything must be right, the mood, the setting, the person. Sex may always be an on-again, off-again thing for EMPATHISTs in the usual up and down love relationship.

The EMPATHIST's conflicts with all the other types will revolve around definitions of the words relationship and love. The EMPATHIST's meaning for these terms is central to the EMPATHIST identity. The EMPATHIST's frustration and pain over missed communications and hurt feelings are totally incomprehensible to all the other types.

A chronically broken heart is a way of life for many searching, seeking EMPATHISTs.

____________________________________

Oh, let's hope not! Let's change that! NFs deserve love too! ;-)
I don't resonate with all of this, but most of it seems pretty darn close. - mu

Gaia: zIDEALISTS - Idealists: Gotta Love 'Em - Idealists (NFs) & Relationships

Re: Idealists (NFs) & Relationships

Idealists (NFs) & Relationships